The Kekistani people have over 2000 years of documented history. Though much of it was destroyed by Cuckistan, expert archaeologists have managed to put together a timeline thanks to recent discoveries. As information at this time is very limited, certain dates are subject to change.
c. 4200 BCE Edit
- Kek creates Earth, man and the universe in his image.
- First instance of the Cult of Kek Prophet "Pepe".
c. 2300 BCE Edit
- First Kekistani civilization is recorded, the Kingdom of Kekistan.
- Kekistanis worship the Egyptian Deity of Primordial Darkness “Kek".
- Creation of the original Kekmendments.
- 'The Awokening' incident - a plague of frogs is sent onto the Black Kangdom.
- The prophet Pepe teaches the villagers to 'Ree' to save them.
- Beginning of frog iconography.
- Cuckistan is founded by followers of Moloch.
- Sargon of Akkad visits Kekistan and is so impressed by their way of life that he chooses to spare them from his conquest.
c. 2200 BCE Edit
- Kek-Cuck War occurs when the nation of Cuckistan attempts to invade the Kekdom. The Cuckistani forces are driven out by the Kekistanis with assistance from Sargon of Akkad.
- The Kekistanis invent meme farming and Kekonomics.
- The golden age of memes begins.
- Kekistanis begin to document “meme magic” said to bring good luck to the people who practice it.
- Golden era ended with the death of Sargon of Akkad (the real one).
- Epic of Gilgamem is recorded.
c. 2100 BCE Edit
- The Kek Knights are formed to protect ethnic Kekistanis from hostile Normies.
- Surviving Kekistani migrate north along the Euphrates river to the lands surrounding the city of Saggaratum.
c. 1488 BCE Edit
- Kek sends his prophet Pepe to give guidance to the lost Kekistani people.
- Pepe sends the Kekistanis through northern Mesopotamia to the coasts of the Caspian Sea to escape the Normies.
- Pepe leads the Kekistanis in forming the Second Kingdom of Kekistan.
- The Second Golden Age of Kekistan begins, marked by Kekistani memes being spread far across the ancient world.
c. 900 BCE Edit
- A small Kekistani army conquers Furrania for Kekistan
c. 700 BCEEdit
c. 666 BCEEdit
- Recognizing that the downfall of the Kekdom is imminent, Moloch tasks his disciple, the demon Stolos, with preparing the Earth for his arrival and ensuring no Kekistanis stand in his way.
c. 200 BCEEdit
- Civil unrest and a plague of Normiebola destroyed many of the Kekistani city states, leaving most of them in east and west Kekistan.
c. 2 BCEEdit
- The last classical Kekistani state is destroyed, and the Kekistani people are left to wander the borderlands of the Roman and Parthian (later Sassanid) empires.
c. 420 AD Edit
- Kekistani people heavily persecuted by Shapur I of the Sassanid Empire.
- The second Kekistani Genocide - 9/11ths of the Kekistanis are killed.
- The ethnic Kekistanis flee to Kekstantinople and Rome.
- Many Kekistanis exiled and scattered across the Middle East and Africa
--very little documented history remains from this point due to the USSR’s 40th Army destroying all other records of Kekistani civilization--.
Modern History Edit
c. 1612 AD Edit
- Earliest recorded meme outside of Kekistan that is the dancing baby in Qularu a old tribal city that was taken other by the kekistani rage of evil
- Cuckistan destroys most records of Kekistani civilization.
- Adolf Hitler makes a deal with Kek to ascend to "Meme God" status in exchange for the sacrifice of six million Jews.
- Alex Jones is born.
- Alex Jones fires his first gun before he learns to walk.
- McDonald's introduces the happy meal.
- Carl Benjamin is born
- Carl Benjamin eats his first McDonald's.
- With assistance from the USSR’s 40th Army, Cuckistan occupies the territory of Modern Kekistan.
- Soviet occupation of Kekistan begins.
- In response to this, Italian disco band P.E.P.E. releases “Shadilay” single to inspire hope and resolve in the Kekistani people.
- “The Frantic Autistic Screeching” incident - marking the end of Soviet Kekistan.
- Alex Jones begins his career as a humble water filter salesman and talking on public-access TV.
- Alex Jones switches his format to short-wave radio.
- GCN News Network established.
- 4chan is launched.
- Brain Force is invented, Alex Jones suffers the side effects of testing and is permanently woke.
- Boy’s Club by Matt Furie is published, featuring the first modern interpretation of Pepe.
- UK paper Daily Mail publishes “Gay Bomb” article.
- The “Gay Bomb” revealed to be a chemical weapon designed to turn enemy soldiers gay.
- Pepe the frog trends as a reaction image on imageboards.
- “Sargon of Akkad” channel is created on YouTube by Carl Benjamin.
- Gay frogs discovered in South Africa of where atrazine was present in the water.
- “The Great Gay Frog Orgy” incident.
- The “#GamerGate” incident.
- Sargon of Akkad begins to make videos on YouTube and gains a loyal following.
- Revolutionary Kekalonia splits from the Republic of Kekistan
- Donald Trump announces candidacy for president, marking the start of the Great Meme War.
- Mainstream Media, establishment politicians and George Soros attempt undermine Trump.
- Alex Jones “breaks the conditioning”.
- A 4chan user posts on /his/ about Kek and the parallels to Pepe.
- Anons begin to refer to the “Cult of Kek” as a form of black magic.
- Anon from /pol/ shouts “Pepe” at a Clinton rally during a speech about the Alt-Right.
- Pepe is declared a hate symbol by the Anti-Defamation League.
- Alex Jones uncovers conspiracy to turn frogs gay.
- Hillary Clinton seen fainting before getting in a car. /pol/ users suspect supernatural anomaly.
- A post reading “Trump will win” gets the “77777777 GET”.
- Kek splits the universe in two to save us, his chosen people, to live in the reality where Trump won the election. This universe is known as the Berenstain Universe while the one left behind is called the Berenstein Universe which was destroyed by Nuclear War as a result of Hillary Clinton's win.
- Donald Trump becomes the 45th US president.
- Shadilay by P.E.P.E. is posted on 4chan with the lyrics; the CD depicts a frog with a magic wand - confirming the existence of meme magic.
- Donald Trump is inaugurated as God-Emperor of America,
- The Battle of Berkeley is fought
- Sargon of Akkad gets his Twitter account suspended for tweeting gay porn.
- Sargon of Akkad announces he will get Kekistan registered as an ethnic minority in the UK census.
- The Resurrection of Pepe
- The official website for the Republic of Kekistan launched.
- Discord server established for the Kekistani people to unite and celebrate their national heritage.
- Sargon of Akkad runs culture stream where he plays Shadilay on repeat for over ten hours.
- Republic of Kekistan Wiki is launched.
- Air raid initiated at the original ancient Kekistan homeland.
- The Second Battle of Hamburg is fought
- The #CNNBlackmail incident occurred.
- The Battle of Charlottesville is fought